There's hope for me.

I have always thought Moses had to be one of the Godliest men in history.  Although I still believe that, my view of him has been altered since reading in Exodus in my Daily Chronological Bible reading.

He is a tad bit different than I had always thought and it gives me hope.  Want to know the difference?!

Moses is normal.  He isn't eloquent with his words, struggles with fear, doubt, disbelief, low self-worth, lack of confidence, he is disobedient, he questions God and he sins and God has to almost strike him dead to remind him of it!


God has to go to major extremes for Moses to understand, believe and follow through with God has told him to do.  He even has to show him physical proof multiple times, when God's spoken word should have been enough.

Need proof?!  Glad you asked.

Proof Moses struggled just like you and me....

1. God had come to Moses in a burning bush and had told him, "Take off your sandals for the place where you are standing is holy ground."  Then  Moses hid his face, because he was afraid to look at God. (fear)
2. God had given Moses specific instructions about going to Pharoah and asking for the Israelites to be released and Moses answered, "What if they do not believe me or listen to me and say, 'The Lord did not appear to you.'" Exodus 4:1  (doubt and questions God)  In order to "prove" to Moses, God ended up giving him 3 miracles to perform just in case they didn't believe: 1)staff turning into a snake, 2)putting his hand into his cloak and it becoming 'leprous' and 3)water in the Nile becoming blood.
3. Even after THREE physical miracles to perform to Pharoah in his repertoire, Moses STILL questioned.  "Oh Lord, I have never been eloquent, neither in the past, nor since you have spoken to your servant, I am slow of speech and of tongue.  (The Lord had to have been frustrated by this point!)  The Lord said to him, 'Who gave man his mouth?  Who makes him deaf or mute?  Who gives him sight or makes him blind?  Is it not I, the Lord?  Now go.  I will help you and speak and teach you what to say." Exodus 3:10-12 (disbelief, NOT eloquent, doubt)
4. In Exodus 4:24, it says, "At a lodging place on the way, the Lord met Moses and was about to kill him.  But Zipporah took a flint knife, cut off her son's foreskin and touched Moses feet with it.  So the Lord left him alone."  Moses had been groomed for 80 years for this mission that God wanted him to do yet there was still sin in his life (not doing what God had clearly told him to do...circumcising his son).  In order for Moses to carry out this plan, Moses had to be repented of his sin and get right with God in order to do so. (sinful)
5. Moses was instructed to go to Pharoah and ask for the Israelites to be released and God even told him that Pharoah's heart would be hardened.  But after Moses went to Pharoah the first time and Pharaoh did just as God told Moses he would do, Moses still questioned.  The plagues hadn't even begun yet and Moses says to God, "Ever since I went to Pharoah to speak in your name, he has brought trouble on this people, and you have not rescued your people at all." Exodus 5:23 (Pharoah had made the Israelites work harder by still asking them a certain quota of bricks, yet were not provided straw to make them like they had in the past.) (disbelief and questioning God)
6. He later questions God again, "If the Israelites will not listen to me, why would Pharoah listen to me, since I speak with faltering lips?" Exodus 6:12 (not eloquent, disbelief)
7. Again in Exodus 6:30, "Since I speak with faltering lips, why would Pharoah listen to me?" (not eloquent, disbelief)

I guess the Lord sunk it into Moses' doubting mind and dense brain because soon after that scripture says that "Moses and Aaron (his brother) did just as the Lord commanded them." Exodus 7:6 and then again "So Moses and Aaron went to Pharoah and did just as the Lord commanded."  Exodus 7:10

I would love for my life testimony to say, "Amanda Lemonds did JUST as the Lord commanded her."  But I am afraid mine would look like Moses' initial testimony..."She struggled, questioned God, didn't belief at times, was NOT eloquent with words, was sinful, feared and doubted God."

Moses' testimony is a reminder to us all that God can use anybody.  He uses those are aren't good at lots of things, but then that is a great testimony to the Lord that we accomplished His purpose in HIS strength, not in our own because we don't have it in us!

For me, THERE'S STILL HOPE that God can use me!  

And there is for you too. 

As God says to Pharoah a couple of chapters later, "But I have raised you up for this very purpose, that I might show you my power and that my name might be proclaimed in all the Earth!"  Exodus 9:16