A year ago today continued...

I went about my day as usual and had an Israel mission trip meeting later that night. During the meeting I had a call from a friend but I silenced it and decided I would call her back after the meeting.  On my way home I called that friend back and she was crying.  Through the tears, she proceeded to tell me that Amber had had a car accident a few hours prior to that and she didn't make it.  She was hit by a lady that ran a red light and the car flipped several times and she was killed instantly.  Both of her children were in the car but were not even injured.  God had his hands on those little ones.  I was completely in shock and I will never forget where I was on the road and the first few minutes of shock, confusion, desperation, questioning etc. that I went through at that very moment.  It was a long few days after that but God was so gracious to me. In my time in the WORD the next day, God gave me the verse Psalms 116:15, "Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of His saints."  I immediately began to replay everything in my mind of our previous day together and all the memories that we had shared and began rejoicing that Amber was indeed one of those precious saints.  She not only was a saint of the King, but she was a true example/reflection of what I wanted my relationship with the Lord to be like.  She truly boasted only in the Cross and was so diligent and purposeful in all of her words and actions.  She was a very Godly wife and mother and a true Biblical representation of a pure, Godly, obedient, submissive woman.  

Over the past year God has been so gracious to me to allow me to remember all of the good times we shared and laugh about old memories.  I am so thankful to the Lord for putting Amber in my life.  I only hope to have half the impact on someone else that she has had in my life.  I have truly celebrated who she was and what she represented and KNOW that she is sitting at the feet of Jesus (probably with some Ethiopian coffee in her hand) and praising the one and only King.  And I guarantee that she wouldn't have it any other way.  If Amber were here today she would tell you that it would all be worth it if this whole situation brought someone to know the Lord, especially her father.  Please continue to pray for him that the Lord would break his heart and allow him to see the Father with spiritual eyes.  I pray that the Lord is as gracious to him as He has been to me.

Honestly, I do miss Amber terribly.  There are days when I can think of the memories and laugh at old times...then there are days when I just want to sob until there are no more tears.  Everything seems to remind me of her.  I do understand that it is ok to grieve and miss someone so I don't feel guilty but I do know that truly I want to celebrate her life because the work God did in Amber...because well it is worth celebrating.  As I sat at the foot of her grave today I recognized and claimed that she is no longer there but with the Father...and there is no better place for her to be.  I have accepted the fact that I do not have to say "goodbye" to her, instead... "Until we meet again...."  I love you my friend.